Torture attacks are actually useful – not just there for titillation.
Whether you’re surfing across a flooded city on half a wall, madly slashing at a biblical sea creature, or punching the ever-loving shit out of a gigantic 40-foot angel, Bayonetta 2 feels like a bunch of coked-up lads constantly trying to one up each other on a wildly escalating stag do. Still, this strangely compelling blend of sassy zingers, proper noun-ed lore and Poundland Danny Devito impersonation all come together to tee up one thing – a gallery of glorious set pieces. Like what if Bayonetta was actually the mother to a half-angel, half-squirrel child? And, if Bayonetta loses more clothes, will her breasts summon city-levelling demons?! The result is a culmination of cutscenes and conversations that would probably give even poor old Psyduck an aneurysm. This is a game that dares to ask questions that we’d wager few people were asking. To see this content please enable targeting cookies.
BAYONETTA FEET FULL
And if you’ve experienced the full swathe of Bayonetta 2’s ‘narrative’, it appears the writers at Platinum struggled with sensible, adult words too. It's the kind of glitzy and giddying mess that only comes from the most carefully crafted Japanese games, and culminates in a vibe so uniquely and inimitably Bayonetta that it's hard to put into sensible, adult words. Make no mistake, this is an experience filled with barely comprehensible story beats and baffling ‘jokes’, yet it’s hard to care when they lead to such a giddying tour de force of combat and endlessly eye-popping spectacle.īayonetta 2 had heart – will Bayonetta 3 have brains? (Hopefully not).
BAYONETTA FEET SERIES
Made under the watchful eye of series creator (and notorious Twitter troll) Hideki Kamiya, impressively, our heroine’s second outing manages to feel even less coherent than its predecessor. The rest, as they say, is Neogaf-baiting history. Thankfully for Nintendo, a slightly skint Sega had recently got cold feet with its new witch, leaving developer Platinum with a finished Bayo sequel sitting on the shelf. With the big N struggling to find an audience for its poorly named Wii successor, it needed great games – and fast. The best part about it, though? This sweary, sexual, angel-slaying sim wouldn’t exist without Nintendo.
A serotonin-secreting source of utterly glorious nonsense. It’s an undeniable high point for the character-driven-action genre. From its manically melodramatic main theme, to a whiplash-inducing Christmas shopping prologue that sees a festive Bayonetta fighting angels atop a fighter jet, Platinum’s turbo-charged joyride is one that never lets up. For those who skipped Nintendo’s Angel-obliterating opus, Bayonetta 2 is an experience that operates entirely in its own sense-defying stratosphere.
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